It’s a bit beautiful actually.
Something nice about the rain falling in the early morning. Granted, I don’t actually have to GO anywhere in it, (if I did, I would be singing a different tune) but to watch it fall, knowing that we are nicely tucked away in a warm, dry house is comforting.
I go for a walk each day with the little ones. I load them up in the double stroller and go for a nice, brisk half hour walk. The rain means that I get to sit about in my pj’s with them instead, drinking coffee, and not feel guilty about lazing about. I seriously have to kick my ass out the door to go for my daily walks. I love walking, but getting the two little ones ready involves chasing my 2.5 year old who fights like crazy to NOT let me get him ready, then getting them both down the 13 slippery steps to the stroller and buckling them in whilst they are trying to escape.
Oh well, not as bad as 6+ months ago when my one year old was colicky and screamed 24/7.
People would say, ‘Take him for a walk, it’s a good de-stresser!’
HAH
DE-stresser?
How about DIStressing!
Walking about the block with a screaming infant in the back seat and an equally miserable 1.5 year old in the front seat is NOT a destresser. Having people pop their heads out the windows of their homes as you walk past while your children emit sounds akini to miniature but LOUD emergency vehicles is NOT a way to destress.
Every time the newest baby would cry, my toddler would have a total meltdown.
I think the three of us spent those first 6-7 months crying.
Okay…. fell off track… where was I?
Oh, yes! Walks!
No one really cries during them anymore, some whining here and there but for the most part, they enjoy them once I actually get them in the stroller and out the door.
But I DO admit to loving it when it’s too rainy to go for that walk. 😀
We run about the house and play instead. Sometimes I just lie on the floor and watch one of their dvd’s while they pretend to watch but for the most part just jump all over me and toss the throw from the couch over my head giggling.
My oldest kidlett is 20 and in between jobs. He was taking some courses at the university but decided he needed to get back to work. There arent many jobs available right now. He’s applied at the entertainment/tech places like Future Shop, and even at fast food places, but nothing.
He could possibly get a job with my husband, but its hard, fast unforgiving physical work in an environment where people often yell and swear when things don’t go well and my son is more the introvert, computer guy. However I think it would do him some good to at least give it a shot for a bit. There are some guys his age working there and he might actually make a friend in this town. His only friends are an hour a way in the city we moved away from two years ago.
My 17 year old is in the bathroom blowdrying her bright pink hair, getting ready for school. I wonder if she knows its monsooning outside? Ok, not a monsoon.. but its DAMN rainy! And she has a bit of a walk. (I dont drive, if I did I of course would not send her out on a 45 minute walk in the rain and wind) She’s an awesome kid. We often share hair dye, but Ive gone back to just black because Manic Panic and Punky Colour just don’t work well on my greying roots. Ive been going grey/white since about 21…. Im no where near TOTALLY white/grey… just all my roots seem to be going that way, LOL. I havent seen my real hair colour in about 15 years though, so who knows. Vampire red, black, Deadly Nightshade…. everything but the dark brown that is lurking in the folicles somewhere… or maybe it IS all white now.. who knows. Anyhow, shes got some great friends, and she’s always making good choices. She struggles in school, but personally she is a loveable kind, good hearted person.
My 15 year old son is…. hm…… well, I Love him.
He’s often mouthy, we argue alot.
He has gone through many ‘special’ programs for behaviour over the years and is now finishing grade nine at home.
OH JOY!
He’s always been my challenge. Not following the rules, being disrespectful and right out ASSHOLE-ish at times. Of course, I’m not a passive mother, I don’t just accept him walking all over me, or breaking rules or being a jerk, which means that I am pretty emotionally exhausted alot.
The sad thing? OMG he is JUST like me at that same age! And my parents rocked. Like I mean they were good to me, never abused me, we never hungered etc etc… and I was still a class 1 bitch.So I think, hell…. if I was such a nasty bitch when I was young, and had no real reason at all cept that I thrived on the whole ‘I’m a victim! I’m misunderstood! I have teenage ANGST!’ identification, then I wonder how the heck I can get my 15 year old to listen when I was a WAY different parent than my parents were.
With MY kids, I raised them on my own from the time my 15 year old was one until 5 years ago. I first became a single mom when my kids were 6, 2.5 and 1. I was 23. It stayed that way for nine years. During those years I was on welfare for awhile until I found work, and then I worked at a really low paying job because that was where my groovy education level got me, lol.
So even though I worked, we had to use the food bank and we struggled and suffered, but I managed to rent the same place for ten years. The last two of those years were spent with my now husband and then best friend, living there also. My rule was “We’re all on the same team, but I am the TEAM CAPTAIN! There is ONE team captain. ME! I will always do what is best for this team, and I will never lead you astray because I have the best interest of this WHOLE family at heart. So if I say JUMP….. TRUST me, because I have your well being, and our well being FIRST and FOREMOST in my heart. AS you are told WHEN you are told, don’t screw around, don’t be a jerk, lets all work together! Teams only come out ahead when they WORK as a team!” etc etc….. yeah, and for the most part, it was great. I was mom and dad, comforter and disciplinary… I laid down the law, and I gave hugs and cuddles.
But my 15 year old is who he is and I’m doing the best I can. I have a counsellor from the school he was recently at come in weekly and help him with some work, and they talk etc. My son likes him, and the counsellor is a good guy. Youngish, and my son and he relate well to each other.
Best friend and I will be married 3 years on May 1st. Beltaine 🙂
He had no kids, and so we took the big jump, got my tubes re-connected (had them tied in 94, when my now 15 year old was born) and had the two little ones we have now. On the table, after having my last one, I had my tubes, cut, tied, cauterized, dissected WHATEVER… but rendered completely useless.. because I am DONE DONE DONE.
There is more to being a woman than having kids.
We arent destined JUST for motherhood.
I have a whole shitload of things that I still want to accomplish in life, and though I LOVE each of my darling lil kidletts, and would not trade my experiences of motherhood for the world, I realize I still want to go out into the world and do things for myself.
Ive been a mother since I was sixteen.
Almost 21 Years now. And for the rest of my life…
There are many things that I havent done yet and I want to do while I’m still able bodied and relatively sane of mind.
Ok…. littlest one is awake. Time to throw on some coffee and go start my day.
In the Wind 